Isn't my blog purty?!

For those who don't pay attention, let me point out the fact that the look of my blog has changed! I couldn't figure out how to make the header larger like I wanted it, nor could I manage to add a third column, so I paid someone to do it! She gave me exactly what I wanted!

If you have a blog and need to spice it up, make sure to contact JudithShakes Designs. I'll certainly be saving her contact info, because I'm sure I'll need her again. It's easier than learning HTML/CSS (or whatever type of coding this is) for myself! :)

I'm a quitter

Some people feel the need to finish every single book they start, no matter what. Not me. I can't keep reading a book I don't like.

This morning, I officially gave up on reading Beach Music by Pat Conroy. I've been trying to finish it for months, which is not like me. Usually I will finish a book pretty quickly if I like it, or give up on it as soon as I decide that I don't. This one has bored me every time I sat down with it, but for some reason, I kept trying.

When I read a novel, I am looking for a story, and this book made me feel as if I was just being given information. Conroy goes into way too much detail about the lives of every single character, and there are a lot of them. He tells so much about each character's past that I kept forgetting what was actually happening in the story. I really wanted to know how it turned out for the main character, and I guess I could still skip around and try to find out, but I don't want to waste any more time reading something I am not enjoying.

I really liked Prince of Tides, and maybe I'll try another Conroy novel someday, but it's time to call it quits on this one.

What a relief!

I've been accused by a few people of being a nerd. I really enjoy trying to live up to that title.

I'm not normally a big fan of goofy, internet tests, but tonight I took one, and it appears that I am not quite so nerdy after all! I'm a "uber cool, light-weight nerd"!




Please note that I am only 1% dumb/dorky/awkward!

Post-holiday stresses

It was too good to be true. I should have known. Logan was given three Thomas the Tank Engine movies for Christmas by one of his aunts. So I am being tortured again. The Thomas addiction lives on!

What's worse is that my housekeeper didn't come today. Part of the reason I took the tree down so early is because I knew today was her day, and I wanted her to be able to clean the floors where the tree had been. Now I have to wait another day to have a clean house! Oh, the humanity!

Since there will no doubt be someone who reads this and thinks, "What a princess! Why doesn't she just clean her own house?"--Please note that I did vacuum today, along with doing two loads of laundry, dusting, cleaning out old junk to make way for new junk, etc. I can't be expected to mop the floors and clean the bathrooms, can I? :)

Bah Humbug!

Okay, next year we are cutting back on presents. Every year, my mom says "I didn't do much this year for Christmas". And every year it's the same thing. Piles of gifts. I did not need anything, but I got stuff anyway! And Captain Chaos hit the jackpot. I had to come home and clean out old toys and clothes to make room for the new ones.

While I was cleaning out and putting away, I took down the tree. Yep, that's right. It's Christmas night, and the tree is gone and all decorations put up. When Christmas is over, it's OVER!

Here's C.C. playing with his new multi-level garage.

And here he is surveying the contents of his stocking.


Jay always gives out candy, whether it's Christmas or not!

Here is Granddaddy, looking just like I felt. "Is it over yet?"

Santa is a slacker

Geez, don't buy a toy made in Germany. The Germans don't know how to write instructions. Poor Santa spent over an hour trying to figure out how to assemble this garage. It comes with a car wash, gas station, elevator and a few other necessary amenities. Logan will love it, but Santa was getting frustrated. He wanted to know why he couldn't have done this earlier, rather than waiting until so late tonight. I told him that was his fault. Santa KNEW this had to be put together. Why did he wait until the last minute? And I'm pretty sure that Santa took a NAP earlier today, when he could have been working on this project. Silly Santa.

Luckily, we had left some cookies and milk for Santa and his reindeer. He scarfed that down while he was working.

BEFORE SANTA

AFTER SANTA



Captain Chaos is going to be so excited to see his overflowing stocking and his new toys. Santa even gave him a Thomas bicycle.

Lightning McQueen to the rescue!

I am finally getting a reprieve from endless hours of Thomas the Tank Engine! I gave Captain Chaos a new movie: Disney Pixar's Cars. This was supposed to be one of his Christmas presents, but I could. not. take. one. more. second. of the Island of Sodor.

"They're two they're four they're six they're eight
Shunting trucks and hauling freight
red and green and brown and blue
they're the really useful crew"

NO MORE!!

It's not even that he watches it that much. But he requires that I have it playing all day, as long as he's awake. Even if he's doing something else, the blasted thing is always playing in the background. If I NEVER hear George Carlin's voice again, it will be too soon. And whose idea was it to have him narrate a Thomas movie in the first place? George Carlin? I mean, I like some of his standup, but narrating a kid's movie? It just doesn't seem right, somehow.

Anyhoo (I hate it when people say that), CC already had all of the Cars characters, so I was pretty sure he'd like the movie. So I made a huge ceremony out of giving him one of his wrapped presents this morning. He was so excited and of course couldn't wait to open it. And it worked! He hasn't asked for his "train movie" all day! YIPPEE!!!!

Me, I want a hula hoop

We took Captain Chaos to see Alvin and the Chipmunks today. It's all about one wannabe songwriter and three smartass rodents. Those chipmunks sure can act! Too bad their co-stars couldn't. Or at least Jason Lee, the guy who plays Dave, didn't really impress me. But Alvin, Simon and Theodore were hilarious! Daddy had a couple of good belly-laughs, and CC sat through the entire thing. Really cute movie. Worth seeing if you have a kid, or even if you just remember the old cartoons and music.

"We've been good but we can't last! Hurry Christmas, Hurry fast!!!"

Bear-footed

CC's babysitter bought him some bear slippers for Christmas. As soon as he got home from school today, he insisted on wearing them. As a matter of fact, he's in bed right now (supposed to be napping, but he's been talking and singing for 45 minutes) and he's still wearing the bear shoes, as far as I know. He wouldn't take them off.

Maybe this is one of those things that only his mommy can appreciate, but I think these look so funny on his feet! Something about those little legs and the big, brown, smiling bear feet! Tee hee! :)

Merry Christmas to me!

I spent a good part of today doing something that I abhor---shopping! A friend went with me, so that made it a little more tolerable, but I would rather have skipped it altogether. It's not because it was Christmas shopping and I don't enjoy giving. It's just that I despise shopping at any time of the year, whether it be for myself or someone else. And the primary reason that it stresses me out at Christmas is because I can never figure out what to get anyone. But my kind friend had a lot of ideas and helped me a lot, and now I am finished! :0)

Now for some extremely exciting news, at least for me. This morning I got a phone call from the publisher of the community newspaper that I wrote that article for. He offered me a monthly assignment! Yes, really! I have a writing gig! I had no idea this was going to happen, and at first I wasn't sure that I heard him correctly. But unless someone played a cruel joke on me today, I am now a columnist! I won't announce here what type of column it will be until its introduction, which is due to be published in February. I'll just say that it's a topic about which I am by no means an expert, but that my background in health care will give me a bit of an advantage in my research on. Amazingly enough, I found out today that the girl I went shopping with and have just recently become friends with is somewhat of an expert on this topic. She's already given me some really good written information and has many ideas for columns, along with connections to people I can interview!

So, I am going from an aspiring writer to a bona fide one! Yay me!

Meltdown at the mall

Today, Captain Chaos had his worst temper tantrum ever. He wouldn't mind me in the play area at the mall. He was sitting on the slide and refused to go down, forcing another child behind him to wait. I asked him to move, and he said "no". I gave him one more chance, told him again to do what I said or we were leaving, and counted to three. He said "I don't want to". So I had to pick him up and carry him all the way through the mall, and then through Macy's, kicking and screaming. He was kicking and screaming. Not me. I was trying to pretend I was somewhere else, as everyone stared at me, either half-smiling in sympathy or rolling their eyes. I'm sure a few people probably debated whether or not to call security, wondering if I was abducting someone's child. The rest of them likely just assumed I'm a terrible mom with no control over her kid.

I'm working on being consistent and following through on my threats, and today was the big test. It's not easy when you are in a public place and your child goes from a happy little kid to Devil Boy in a matter of seconds. He begged and pleaded with me to take him back to play. He begged all the way out to the truck. It was hard, because I actually felt kind of sorry for him. But if I had given in, he would have won, and then he would know that he doesn't really have to obey me. I am so adamant about not wanting my child to be the brat that no one wants to play with or be around. The thing is, his teachers tell me that he is very well-behaved at school. I guess he just saves it for me.

Thankfully, we had already bought what we went there for. Gifts for his teachers. We got these really cute little gingerbread man ornaments. They came with little accessories for decorating, so that's what we did tonight.

How to keep your 2 year old quiet

Captain Chaos loves to hide from me in the evening after his bath. He hasn't yet figured out that when hiding, it's kind of important to change your hiding place. So he always hides under the blanket on the couch.

One thing that I have discovered is that if I don't "find" him quickly, he will stay under the blanket hiding.......indefinitely. So tonight I just stopped looking and plopped down on the other couch to relax. I heard an occasional sniff or giggle, but other than that, he must have been quiet for a good five minutes. That might not seem like a long time, but trust me; in this house, five minutes of peace and quiet is a wonderful gift.

So now if I need a few minutes of down time, I'll just start a game of hide-and-seek, and make sure CC is "it".

Wait a minute. That gives me an idea. If I am "it", I get to hide, right?

Hm. I wonder how long it would take him to find me...............

Christmas tree and my movie recommendations

I don't know if I ever had a real tree when I was growing up, and I haven't put up a tree at all for the past 20 years that I have lived on my own. This year, however, I decided to actually decorate for Christmas, since CC is old enough to enjoy it now. So we forced Daddy to go with us to buy a "Black Hills Spruce", or at least that's what the tree salesman told me it is.

The tree is pretty, but real trees make extra work. I have to keep remembering to water it, and it drops pine needles all over. At least I thought ahead and put it on the tile floor rather than the carpet.

Decorating it was a lot of fun! Captain Chaos loved it. He was walking from me to the tree, holding ornaments and saying "I'm decorating!" and "I'm hanging these balls!" :)
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Last night, we had dinner at a Mexican restaurant we hadn't been to in a while. CC likes it because there is a fountain he can throw money in. I don't think the people in the next booth liked us, however. It might have had something to do with the fact that CC sneezed on them. Well, I don't think he sneezed on them, but he definitely sneezed in their general direction.

Yes, I am trying to teach him manners.
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Here's a movie NOT to see: Before The Devil Knows You're Dead. It starts off with a positively revolting sex scene. And when I say starts off, I mean it's the very first thing you see. I don't want to watch anyone having sex, but especially not Philip Seymour Hoffman, the star of this depressing film. And I don't think there was one happy moment in the entire hour and fifty-seven minutes. Don't believe a word that Roger Ebert says in the review linked to above. This movie stunk.

If you're looking for a good one to see, try No Country For Old Men. Tommy Lee Jones outdoes himself.

Down and out

My entire body has been aching for 3 days now. On top of that, I am stuffy and sneezing and just plain miserable. Obviously, I have the flu. So that is why there isn't much blogging going on here, and may not be for another day or two.

Armchair parenting

From his couch, my husband likes to critique the way I handle our son in the evenings. For example, last night Captain Chaos was sick, and since he didn't feel good, he was even less cooperative than usual. All he wanted was his pacifier, which he still uses at bedtime. I was trying to brush his teeth, and had to bring the toothbrush into the living room because there was no chance of getting him to come to the sink.

You haven't lived until you have tried to brush a 2-year-old's teeth while he is thrashing violently, kicking you and screaming at the top of his lungs.

"Why don't you get him a binky? He's begging for it! Are you just going to let him cry like that?!"

I can't tell if he's bothered by the fact that his son is upset, or if he's irritated that he can't hear the television.

I guess I should thank him, though. He did manage to put down the remote long enough to go get the binky himself.

I also have to thank him for so kindly volunteering to watch CC one afternoon last week. "If you put him down for his nap, I'll watch him so you can get out of here for a while."

Yeah. He's pretty easy to take care of when he's sleeping.
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DISCLAIMER: For all of my ranting here, my husband is a very good father. Although everything I have written here is true, it's all in fun. He does spend a lot of time with his son, and loves him very much! He's actually more patient with CC than I am.

He's even been known to get up off the couch occasionally. :)

I'm going to be famous! Famous, I tell you!

Ok, not really. But my "article that isn't really an article" is going to be published! I got the call today!

If only my cell phone had been working properly. The publisher had something he wanted to discuss with me, but he requested that I call him next week from a phone that does not echo.

And if my phone had been working properly, I might have been able to actually hear what he was saying, and maybe I would know when this issue is going to come out.

And if my phone had been working properly, we also could have discussed in a little more detail what is going to be printed about me to go along with the article.

You'd think that something like this would have given me the inspiration to write a better blog entry than this. But at least it did inspire one thing.

I went out and bought a new cell phone. :)

Gullible people

Why do people insist on forwarding to me every single, silly email they get? First, let's talk about the ones that threaten dreadful consequences if you don't forward to 12 people within 5 minutes. Or even better, the ones that say "if you love Jesus, please forward.......if not, then just delete!" Please! The fact that I deleted your email rather than cluttered up all of my friends' inboxes with that crap has nothing to do with my relationship with God! And then there are the email snowball fights, lucky angels, goofy poems--whatever. I don't even read that garbage anymore. As soon as I figure out what it is, I hit the delete button. In fact, if you're sending me an email, be careful what you put in the subject line, because if it even sounds silly, it's zapped instantly! I don't want to waste my free time on that kind of nonsense!

So what brought this little tirade on today? Well, this morning I received two silly forwards. And that is what inspired the title of this blog entry.

The first one was a warning not to accept the "new dollar coins", as they have the words "In God We Trust" omitted. This is not true. I realize that atheists have been trying to remove God from our currency (and everything else) for years, but it hasn't happened yet.

The next email I opened was a "coupon" from Blockbuster. It said:

Here's a free coupon to Blockbuster for 2 free movie rentals, popcorn, and 2 20oz coke products. It is a printable coupon, so use it before Dec 31 for a great date night, family night. or something. Don't be selfish, forward this on to as many people as you can, but you can use it only once...Blockbuster notes the coupon on your account.

There was an attachment, presumably the coupon, which I did not open because I don't trust email attachments too often. But being suspicious, as I am about everything I see online, I checked it out HERE. It's not a valid coupon. Surprise! A coupon that can be forwarded to an unlimited number of people for 2 free movies and refreshments? Come on!

I can think of dozens of similar emails I have received over the years. Free cash for forwarding an email message, missing children, satellite photos of the Space Shuttle Columbia as it exploded (That was one of my favorites. Check it out HERE! Look at the pictures! Would you have believed that one? Don't admit it if you did!).........I could go on and on, but I think I've made my point.

So tell me, why do people believe everything they read online? Okay, so maybe you aren't sure about something. Maybe it even sounds plausible. But at least check into it before sending it on to someone else! Especially if that someone else is me!

Football games and gift ideas

Yesterday we went to my sister-in-law's house to watch football. I only found out this morning that the Bucs lost. I still don't know who they played or if they were in Tampa or away. Yes, I was there. But that's how little attention I pay to the game. I really couldn't care less about football. Sure, it was fun the year we went to the Superbowl (Did we win it? Seriously. I can't remember!), but even if they lost every single game all season, it wouldn't affect my life at all.
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In case anyone was wondering, I did submit an article to that small, local newspaper; the one that I mentioned here a little over a month ago. Last week I got a phone call and then an email, asking me to resubmit using another file type, as they were unable to open my attachment the first time. I did that. I haven't heard back since. So, either they hated it, or haven't had a chance to look at it yet. Truthfully, I feel kind of silly even calling it an "article". It was really just a list based on the research I had done on the topic they requested. I had to do it that way in order to keep the word count down. So I really wasn't very proud of what I wrote by the time I was finished. Although it did have an opening and closing paragraph that took some work, the rest of it anyone could have written. How much skill does it take to make a list of local children's activities? I really do think it would be a good thing for them to print, however. I remember when I first had Logan, I had no idea what to do with him. I could have used a list like the one I sent in.
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Let's see, what else? Oh yeah, Chia Pets. Every year, you can tell it's almost Christmas when the Chia Pet ads start playing on TV. I hear it every morning now while getting dressed. I heard it this morning, and now I can't stop singing the tune in my head. Ch-Ch-Ch- Chia! I don't which is worse, that or Clap on, Clap off......The Clapper!

Does anyone really buy a Chia Pet as a Christmas gift?

Please don't get me one.

Parade watching 101

Today was the St. Pete Beach Christmas Parade. We learned something very useful about parade watching. I'll get to that in a minute.

First, note how hip CC looks in his shades.

Here we are, waiting for the festivities to begin. I do believe that it's time for me to invest in some good photo editing software. I could have used it to tan my bony, white chicken legs.

During the parade, CC kept a careful inventory of the contents of his candy bag.

Is this a joke? I seriously don't know. It looked like a real fire truck. But F.A.R.T? The FART team? Go figure.

And here is the one lesson you should take away from this blog entry. Always sit at the beginning of the parade route. That's how you score the loot. They even threw chocolate, which would have been melted (or more likely, gone) by the end of the parade. Captain Chaos walked away with a pile of candy, a stuffed animal, and some serious beadage.

Okay, now I have something to say

I bought my own domain name! Starting in the next 24-48 hours, you will be able to go to http://www.chronicreader.com/ to read my blog. The old address will still work, as well. It will just redirect to my new one!

I'm so excited. I have my own web address. :)

Happy Pearl Harbor Day

I am actually getting hits on my blog. I have learned how to use "Feedburner", and I can sign on and see how many people have looked at my blog each day, and even where they are logged on from! How cool is that?

I'm glad that I have some regular readers (well, a few), except for the fact that I am now feeling pressure to blog about something, even when I have nothing to say. And today would be one of those days when I have nothing to say.

Oh, I did get invited to lunch! That doesn't happen often, as I don't have any friends! But I had a "play date" at the house yesterday (Four 2-year-olds in addition to mine made for a chaotic morning), and one of the moms called today and asked me to meet her before we pick up the little ones from school.

Telemarketers and toddler mood swings

Tonight I got a call from our telephone company, informing me that since I am a customer, they can provide high-speed internet service for a very low rate. I told them I was perfectly happy with my current provider. So the sales rep said, "You aren't interested in saving money?"

I hate loaded questions like that.

Not five minutes later, I got a call from our cable internet provider, letting me know that since I am a customer, they can provide telephone service for only $16 more per month.

Sometimes I like to toy with telemarketers. I just politely ask if they can hold on for a minute. When they say yes, I put them on hold. Then I just don't come back. Ever. I'm not sure how long it takes, but they finally give up. I figure if they are going to waste my time, I'm going to waste some of theirs, as well.

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Tonight I was playing with Happy Baby for a little while. Happy Baby was in a good mood. He was watching Barney, and laughing and acting very silly.

Then, suddenly and without warning, Grouchy Baby showed up. I don't know where he came from, but he was not near as much fun as Happy Baby.

Grouchy Baby finally went to bed just after 8:00, after a brief intermission, during which Wild Baby showed up to entertain us. I didn't get any pictures of him because he was moving too fast.

This is a test. This is only a test.

This is a test of the email notification system. Would the 63 people who have already subscribed to my blog please let me know if you receive your email notifying you of the new blog post?

Ok, only one person subscribed. Yes, that one person is my mom. Stop laughing. It hasn't even been 24 hours since I added the option.

Wait a minute. No one is laughing. Why not? Oh, that's right. No one else reads this except for my mom.

Extra! Extra!

I just spent well over an hour figuring out how to offer a subscription option on my blog. It's not something that Blogger offers, but I saw it on another member's blog, so I knew it could be done. I had to search the internet to figure out what I needed to do, then sign up for some "feed thingy", copy a code, and figure out where to paste that code in my blog setup. This was not easy for me, as I had absolutely no clue what I was doing. So, please look over on the right and enter your email address to subscribe. Then you will get email updates when I post a new blog! I think it might even paste my blog post into your email. What more could you ask for? I am sure that hundreds of people will sign up. Who wouldn't want to keep up with all the fascinating things that go on inside my head?

Please email these men!

Two border patrol agents, Ignacio Ramos and Jose Compean are serving 11- and 12- year terms, while the drug smuggler they shot worked some type of immunity deal for testifying against them at the trial. Now, these men are in a tiny prison cell, convicted of assault with serious bodily injury, assault with a deadly weapon, discharge of a firearm in relation to a crime of violence and civil rights violations!

There is a whole lot more to this story, and I don't have the time to get into it here, but I did find a website through which Nacho and Jose can receive emails. All letters will be printed and sent to them.

I just feel so bad for these men who were attempting to protect
our border and are now being punished for doing their job. Meanwhile, our president pardons his buddy Scooter, yet refuses to pardon these two heroes.

You can click on the links to the right if you want to email them.
I did.

Snowfest and Parade

We had to park several blocks away from the parade route. Chaos had to run to catch up with Daddy on the way.
We got to see some real snow!

CC was looking exceedingly cool in his shades.

I saw a photo op, so I sent him to pick me a flower.

Here comes the parade!